"Captain Bravado"
Long ago, there lived an officer of the Royal
Navy named Captain Bravado. He was a manly man's
man, who showed no fear when facing his enemies.
One day, while sailing the Seven Seas, his
lookout spotted a pirate ship approaching, and
the crew became frantic. Captain Bravado
bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!"
The first mate quickly retrieved the captain's
red shirt, and while wearing the brightly colored
frock, the Captain led his crew into battle and
defeated the pirates.
That evening, all the men sat around on the deck
recounting the day's triumph. One of them asked
the Captain, "Sir, why did you call for your red
shirt before battle?"
The captain replied, "If I were to be wounded in
the attack, the shirt would not show my blood.
Thus, you men would continue to fight, unafraid."
All of the men sat and marveled at the courage of
such a manly man's man.
As dawn came the next morning, the lookout
spotted not one, not two, but TEN pirate ships
approaching. The crew stared in worshipful
silence at the captain and waited for his usual
orders. Captain Bravado gazed with steely eyes
upon the vast armada arrayed against his ship,
and without fear, turned and calmly shouted, "Get
me my brown pants!"